These are the reasons some people think I am still single...
Readers discretion is advised. Please do not take a big sip of your drink and then read this as I will not be held responsible for the spittage of liquids your screens :P
Eric- (6:07 PM):
"You're just to hot for men to handle"
Me- I think you may have a good point there my friend...
Julie- (6:03 PM):
"Is it because you eat the heads of your mates after copulation? That used to be my problem.. until I discovered--poutine and now poutine is the reason I am single"
Me- I would need to copulate before this would be a possible reason... but I appreciate your sharing and I have researched some places for you to call to get help with this ;)
Aiden (6:10 PM):
"Because being single means you're not required to share your booze."
Me- You must not know most of my friends... I ALWAYS share my booze. Damn friends...lol
Mark (6:12 PM):
"Because you won't sleep with me."
Me-Yup! lol
Chris (6:24 PM):
"Ask me again after letting me take you out."
Me- ummmmmmmmmmmmm
Derek (6:27 PM)
"The only reason you are single is because I'm in Toronto ;)."
Me- Tease! You're one of the biggest playboys I know (I'm lying but you're a big one!) ... Thank you... *blushes* hehehe
Michael (6:35 PM):
"Use a Ouija board and ask the spirits. I'm gay!"
Me: And this comes from the man I've slept the most with in nearly three years... sad... so sad... sleep... no seriously, it was just sleep HE IS GAY! LOL
Rob (6:39 PM):
"You know what? In my thinking, I've come up with this: You're single because you're actually Ted Rogers disguised as a cute single girl, but just like "We have a great mobile service", everyone can totally see through the bullshit.
Thus you actually aren't single. You liar."
Me: My secret is out... but so is yours... You called me a "cute single girl" OH YA BABY! I mean... thank you kindly *huggles*
Anthony (7:22 PM):
"I thought you were gay... where did the gay go? There goes my fantasy...are you even a little gay still?"
Me: CALM DOWN! Stop bringing me into your fantasy world! I am who I am and am not it for your entertainment.... CALM DOWN! lol
Julia (7:25 PM):
"Because you love me. You've always loved me, and you will always love me. Stop denying it and do me already!!!!!!!!!!!"
Me- Okay
Matt (7:40 PM):
"Because you like it too much."
Me: Damn lie!
James (8:02 PM):
" It's because you date douche bags who don't deserve you. Pass on the douche! You don't need it!"
Me: I think this is a, "thank you" kinda moment...Thank you!
Jing (9:02 PM):
"I pick at all the choises you have...and they sux...btw....sorry about the last one."
Me: Not totally your fault. I fell on my own...booooooooo Forgive me though if next time you try to set me up I hand you my heart conveniently pre-ripped out of my chest to save time. He was great other than the hurty stuff *pouts*
Nick - (9:11 PM):
"It's because there's already a man in your life...his name is Rambo."
Me: This is a good point... but Rambo is 5lbs and a literal dog. I don't mean to sound overly picky... but I would also like to have a human in my life not related and to whom I want to jump... pretty please :P
Now I am going to go eat some fresh home made Congee and ponder how to remedy this...
No I do not have a straight face right now...
Buahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaa!
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7 comments:
Derek ... you bastard ... you stole my "nice" answer. Now how am I supposed to sweet talk her?
I think you should ask your favorite type of cheesecake.
copulation, fornication. it's all sexy time. lactose 4 life.
p.s. who is this Rob? i like his moxy. not that i have scene is moxy. but the pictures you sent to me of it are very nice.
p.p.s. your mobile service sucks. i have a qualm with your cable provisions as well.
p.p.p.s i really hate when people use post post script. or post post post script.
I asked my favorite cheesecake and it told me to stop eating it or I will end up with it as my reason...
In response to Julie... Rob is a friend of mine from highschool back in T.O. I'm glad you enjoyed the pics of his moxy... send them back as I must not have a copy as I have been looking for them franticly :P
umm. i may have sold them to a hobo in exchange for two cans of Faxe beer. you want one?
I'm all over that! We'll make a day out of it! We should do our bed linin party and drink hobo Faxe beer you got in exchange for Rob's moxy photos... I know people say my life sees odded when I spell it out...THEY WERE RIGHT! hahaha Let's do it!:P
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